What I’m seeing lately … german adventures

A day trip to Baden-Baden?

I would have never thought of that before but hey why else would you socialize with fellow students if not for broadening your horizons. Even though it’s not my city nor my favourite art, I initated a trip to see this world famous contemporary artist. We went to see the new exhibition called                                                                   Birkenau, by Gerhard Richter.

 

What I’m seeing lately… the present.

Since it is the end of the winter term I finally finished all exams and get to see a few (new) places. During the final weeks I have not had much time discovering new areas let alone travelling around the globe. Yet I have managed to get some new impressions and inspirations from the last couple of exhibitions I have visited here in Stuttgart.

A few snapshots of my frequent evening activities – when I found some spare time in between studying.

So many thoughts… on obsessions.

sometimes i feel like using them

using them simply for my personal need

my art

my obsession

my needs

using them for filling holes

that shouldn’t be filled

 

Am I not the more creative

the more I suffer

is it not the pain

that keeps me going

on and on

thinking

feeling

saying

all those things, all those memories

recreating scenes

I have once lived

or am about to.

Or is it simply the fact

of feeling something

anything

everything

 

The more I am experiencing

the more flows right through me

and onto the paper

Once there was something

that made me feel alive

There will be an empty space

Once it stops

and then it all comes back

the pain.

 

Pain

it was just always there

so easy to channel

to use it for my own

needs

my passion

my art.
  

So many thoughts… on loneliness.

Isn’t it poetic?
All these single souls,
Door to door
Yet all alone and by themselves.
Fighting off the nightmares
Thoughts that creep up your mind
And get stuck where there causing nothing but harm
Never being able to really rest,
Always haunted
Never at peace.
It’s a struggle all the way
And all it takes to fight it
All it really takes
Is to step from one door
Into another

Why is it so hard for all those lost souls?
Peace is so close,
Rest is so near
Yet it has never been
More difficult
And the solution
Simpler
Than right now and there.

Instead they are haunted
By nightmares
And horrible ideas
Of all that could be
And all that will never be

They are alone
With all their struggles
All there hopes and dreams
Left unfulfilled and ignored
Shredded by their own mind

Haunted by insomnia
The everlasting feeling of
Never truly being awake
Yet not being able to find a minute of sleep
Rest for mind and soul
Not granted by their dark side
They can’t help it
Can’t help to hurt themselves
Punish themselves for what they are doing to their beings
Instead of just changing the fact and stop the pain.

Laying wide awake in these big empty beds
Each one on their own
Trying to find true meaning of life
Pondering about what the day will bring
And what the last has left behind

They all feel the same

Lonely.
  
 

Poetry for the night…freedom or faith?

Sometimes I wander about

lost

in thoughts

feelings

space.

 

sometimes I wonder about

thoughts

feelings

freedom.

 

Sometimes I wander about

those empty lonely streets

look up at the facades

of all these houses

winding down the street

all dark and old

telling me nothing.

 

Sometimes I wander about

those roads that lead nowhere

look up at the sky

and see nothing.

 

Sometimes I wonder about

where I’m headed

or what is going to be next

Wonder whether my feelings

are guiding me

or misleading my path.

 

Sometimes I wonder about

this thing

called

freedom.

   

   

What I’m seeing lately… Carneval, Fasching, Fasnet, you name it.

Lately I’ve been seeing lots of crazy outfits out on the streets. Depending on the city you live in I guess that would not really be something special or worth mentioning. The place where I live is not one of these cities though. It is a very uptight straightforward city, where costumes belong to the theatre and crazy people to the circus. Once a year though, they make an exception. And that’s what Fasching is there for. I myself have not yet come to understand the concept of dressing up as someone or something you’re not or never want to be, get wasted, and do silly things. The concept of party fun I am very aware of, yet behind the Fasching, the Carneval, there is a whole culture behind it, at least that’s what I was introduced to past weekend. There were cowboys, monks, hippies, dragons, police officers, devils and angels and cats and bears and all kinds of beings all trying to have a good time, dancing or howling to folk songs which were entirely unfamiliar to me.
There was everything from live music to strong mixed drinks and people seemed to have an honest amount of fun. I loved seeing something so utterly unfamiliar to me and learning something new about this strange place I begin to call home.

I am glad to have made that experience, a memory to add to my collection, shared with people that became friendly souls to me over the past few months.